Wednesday, December 26, 2007

Did You Know?

Gloria was sleeping on the couch last night.

Sleeping pleasantly, she emitted what can only be described as swamp gas.

If Eli 6.4 does this, I call him Tommy the Toxic Tooter. With a member of the fairer sex, though, a more diplomatic approach is required.

Fortunately, diplomacy is one of my strong suits. So when Gloria started to wake up, I was ready.

"Honey, did you know that people can fart in their sleep?" I asked.

"No," she said, still groggy.

"Apparently, they can," I said. "And these 'dream farts,' as I like to call them, are incredibly powerful and noxious compared to a regular fart."

"Why are you telling me--oh, good grief! Jesus!"

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